hey...look at that!

i am a visual person.

i love colors.

i cannot even imagine a world of black and white. i love watching movies and television. i prefer pictures over words. when i do read a picture-less book, i visualize the scenes, the characters, the emotions and i get lost in another world.

when i have to go someplace, it's easier for me to use a map than take down directions (i envy people who can go places just by remembering the directions in their head).


my papa loves to take pictures. i remember when i was younger, he would always take our pictures, stolen or "stolen." ["o, kunyari malungkot ka. ayan, harap dito. ngiti ng konti. ngiti..ngiti...ops, tama na yan. o, gusto ko may luha naman...oy, OA na yan ha!".....just kidding] one day i told myself that i wanted to do that, too. there's something about preserving a favorite memory in paper.

but college came and life became too chaotic for me. i actually joined the Camera Club once, my one and only futile attempt during my school years to pursue photography. of course, the only thing i took home with me was a keychain of a roll of Kodak film with a neon sticker that says "DLSU CAMERA CLUB." (i still have that keychain today). my ambition never did fly because i never even attended the orientation (well, you know. misplaced priorities and all...).

it got worse when i started working. i was so focused on proving myself in my job that all ambitions of ever pursuing anything besides programming flew out the window.

but the good thing about dreams is that they never die.

i left the IT world. i entered the crazy world of teaching children. and, suffice to say, all my dreams came crashing back. with a vengeance.

i mentioned in my first ever post that i was obssessing about buying a digital camera. you see, i want to delve into the wonderful world of photography. i really do. but my finances (or lack thereof) overrule my chances of going full blast. i can only use up a roll at a time. i was almost losing hope when a good friend of mine told me that Fuji developing centers can actually turn negatives into digital files (unfortunately for me, my camera only uses Advantix film. they don't count. darn.). so when you give them a roll of film, they give you a cd of all the pictures at a minimal cost. ALLELUIA!

after giving me a few tips here and there, papa told me i can use his SLR cameras (woohoo!). of course, there's always a catch. turned out that both of his cameras are jammed. the films loaded in them are already expired and i have to pay a certain amount to have it fixed. aaahh, life. always full of surprises.

but, i'm not discouraged. the fact is, i've got my dream back. and it'll take more than a jammed camera to hold me down, that's for sure.

The Thinker

while i was editing my posts, i just realized that i actually made my own blog w/o even thinking, researching, hesitating, or reading other people's blogs.

wow.

wait, before anyone screams, "Ang babaw mo!," i just want to explain myself.

i'm a person who enjoys planning ahead. before i go to sleep, i usually think of the things i have to do the next day. everytime i remember something important, i have to note it down in my cellphone's Calendar folder. i love to make lists in my head about anything and everything (favorite movies, favorite churches, favorite tv shows, favorite shirts that i currently own, things to look for in a guy...hehe.).

when i encounter something new, i normally:
1. observe from a safe distance
2. test the waters (by cautiously dipping my toes)
3. if it's safe, i jump in.

[notice that i just had to number the steps...]

oh, and i love to dream, too.

but for some reason, i didn't even go through my usual routine. it's as if something led me to that webpage and i just had to type (ok, a bit dramatic...). hhmm....well, if it's not that, then i must be either:
1. totally psyched about my digicam obssession, or
2. growing up & taking more risks in life

although my brain wishes that it was the latter, i'm pretty sure it's the first reason. (aw, shucks)

but so what, right???

there's nothing wrong with that.

at least, i don't think so.

um....

wait.

let me think it over first...

kulit bulilit vol. 1

kids say the darndest things.

during my second year as a preschool teacher, i decided to compile funny and memorable quotes of my kids (i handle toddlers Ü). armed with my handy dandy notebook, i started scribbling away. shempre, nung una ang sipag ko pa. unfortunately, i wasn't able to do it consistently (can you say mañana habit??). well, i swore to myself that i'll work on my "book" again this coming schoolyear...[o, walang kokontra!]

anyway, here's the current list of my favorite quotes from my toddlers. have fun! (if some of them aren't that funny, well, you should have been there when it happened. trust me, it was definitely hilarious.)

1. "Look, I'm drinking like a lady!" - Martin drinking his packed juice daintily (with his pinky finger sticking out!)

2. one time, Nik wanted to use Teacher Rinna's cellphone to talk to his daddy. Teacher Rinna hasn't paid her bill yet so Nik couldn't use her phone.
a few days after that, Nik wanted to call his daddy again. Teacher Rinna (who paid her bill already) handed him her phone after she dialed his dad's number. when Nik heard that the line was busy, he turned to Teacher Rinna and innocently asked, "Bayad ka na?"
[this gave us a good laugh :) ]

3. "I want to call Daddy!" - Nik exclaimed while his dad came out of the restroom and was standing right behind him

4. "How big naman this baby!" - Dani while hugging Jaime

5. "Hi pogi!" - Teacher Alice to Javi
Chino burst into boisterous laughter.
"Pogi!" - Chino pointing at Javi (and still roaring with laughter)

6. "The radio in the bus goes bee-bop-baduy!" - Chino making up his own lyrics to "Wheels on the Bus"
"Who's baduy, Chino?" - Teacher Alice, amused
"Uh...Javi!" - Chino suddenly pointing at Javi [poor Javi!]
"I'm not baduy!" - Javi exclaimed indignantly

7. "I'm chasing after Martin!" - Dani while riding the tricycle in the garage
"Dani, Martin's over there," - me [holding my laughter], pointing out Martin, who was at the other side of the garage
(Pause) "Oh."

8. Javi sat on the bench beside Manisha. Isabel suddenly wanted to take his place.
"Javi, only girls!" - Manisha told him
"Only boys!" - Javi, defending himself
"Manisha, Javi was first." - Teacher Alice, settling the issue
Manisha suddenly turned to Isabel.
"Isabel, Javi was first!" - Manisha, trying to save face :)

9. "Manisha, what color is that?" - Kaitlin
"It's blue. Kaitlin, say ba-lu. Balu." - Manisha teaching Kaitlin how to say blue

10. "JAIMEN!" - Bianca calling JAIME at the top of her voice while we were in the playground

11. "Baby!" - Dani walking towards Jaime with her arms open wide
"No baby!" - Jaime running away from Dani
[during the first semester, Jaime became Dani's favorite classmate. she declared to us - and to the people at home - that he was her baby. :)]

12. This happened during Choice Time.

a. My conversation w/ Javi:
"What are you drawing, Javi?"
"A monster!"
"What's happening to your monster?" [he was making violent strokes on his paper]
"The monster is dying and dying!"
"Why is he dying?"
"Because he's dead!"

b. Chino (seated beside Javi) was also drawing.
"I'm drawing a monster!" - Chino
"What's your monster doing?" - Teacher Alice
"He's bathing...in a bathtub."

c. "My monster is dead!" - Chino (after he heard my conversation w/ Javi)
"Why is he dead?" - me, smiling
"Because he went to the supermarket."
[somehow i'm afraid to ask his mom what happened the last time they went to the supermarket...]

13. "How is she feeling?" - me, as i was reading a story to Isabel
"Sad."
"Why is she sad?"
"Because she's not happy." - Isabel
[i had to ask.]

14. I was reading a Sesame Street story.
"Friends, where do you think they're going?" - me, showing them a picture of the characters riding a school bus
"To Megamall." - Chino, grinning.

15. "This one is for Mama. This one is for Papa. And this one is for the little boy who lives down the lane." - Chino showing me the different miniature furniture in the Dramatics Area

16. while we were having Circle Time, the kids were having a "friendly" conversation about superheroes.
"I'm Batman!" - Javi
"I'm Wonder Woman!" - Manisha
"I'm Spiderman!" - Chino
"I'm Superwoman!" - Kaitlin
"I'm Superman!" - Javi
"I'm Supergirl!" - Manisha
[pause...we had a feeling they ran out of superheroes. hehehe.]
Kaitlin suddenly exclaimed with arms held up high, "I'M KRYSTALA!"
[Teacher Alice and I ended up rolling on the floor laughing. i thought i was going to bust a gut.]

picture this!

Canon Ixus Z65 & Canon EOS 20D

i have a serious digital camera obssession. seriously.

right now, i own a film camera. yes, that's right. a camera that actually uses FILM. in this digital age, i only know a few people who actually use film cameras (hhmm....so there's kit, nat....um....oh. that's about it.) of course, let's not forget the professional photographers and ultimate camera enthusiasts. but that's besides my point.

owning a digicam is such a frustration for me. not that i'm complaining about the quality of film cameras (Canon film cameras have excellent quality). i guess it's the hassle of having the film developed, filing it in an album/scrapbook, and - gasp! - scanning it for friends who want to see our shots ("Uy, pa-send ng pictures, ha!"). um, you know, that would be easy if I HAD A SCANNER!!! (mentally counting from one to ten....make that, one to twenty....)

ok. i'm calm.

case in point. owning a digital camera is much more convenient because:
1. i get to check my shots immediately after taking them,
2. i can delete shots that i don't like,
3. i can save it in my computer/cd/cellphone....(oh wait. my cellphone doesn't have a camera. but that's another story.),
4. i can print pictures that i really like, and
the top reason why owning a digital camera is more convenient than owning a film camera:
5. I CAN EMAIL THE PICTURES TO MY FRIENDS! (note to self: look for new friends...)

well, if i was still working in an IT company, i actually can buy a digicam. buuuut, i'm not working in an IT company anymore. i'm a preschool teacher (snaps to preschool teachers everywhere! - hhmm, i think i need to stay away from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy for a while). i love my work but unfortunately, the pay is not as, um, sufficient to acquire myself a brand spankin' new digital camera.

so there.

last saturday, i met up with friends in Greenbelt. after saying goodbye, i decided to use what's left of my film. have you seen those adorable ducks in the pond around the chapel?? soooo cute! anyways, i took pictures of these ducks. you know, God has a very funny sense of humor. really. at that same moment, there were two girls who were looking for somebody to take their picture. well, by some miracle, they saw me squatting on the bridge, desparately trying to take a good close-up shot of those (adorable) ducks. i don't know if this gave them the conclusion that i was some hotshot photographer, but when i was done, the owner of the camera tapped my shoulder and asked me if i could take their picture. now, that's not a big deal for me. i mean, people usually do that. but what blew me away was that this girl owns a CANON EOS 20D!! that's an SLR camera that has a whopping 8.2 megapixels!

AAAaaaaarrrrggh! just what i needed.

so there i was, taking an innocent picture of two people posing in front of the Greenbelt chapel. i think i even gulped when my (shaking) hands first held this digicam masterpiece. i was seriously fighting the urge to take off with her camera. i could always toss her my film camera to ease her pain.

what followed was an act of pure masochism. i headed for Avant (a high-end Abenson branch in GB4) to look (and drool, actually) at the display of digital cameras.

heavy sigh.

wait. not that i'm not doing anything to cure this addiction. i'm actually selling my Canon Ixus Z65 (please see Friendster classified ads for details. ehehe.). it's the only (legal) way i can think of that i can buy a digicam. the funny thing is, my prospect buyers actually think that i'm selling a digicam (even if i actually included FILMCAM in the details - except for my Friendster post. that was my mistake. ). you wouldn't believe the reactions i get after i emailed, posted, and texted people about this sale. all of them suddenly said they weren't interested anymore when they found out that i was actually selling a film camera.

another heavy sigh.

will i ever stop dreaming? (No!)
will somebody buy my film camera? (i hope!)
will i ever get to own a digital camera? (YES!!! i WILL find a way! *insane laughter*)

someday...